How many times have we seen it, especially 30 years ago? Black men arrested and charged with the rape and/or murder of a white woman? Often poor and uneducated, these men are told if they plead guilty, they’ll avoid the death penalty. Despite the fact that the four year old son of the victim has always maintained that only one man attacked and killed his mother, three men— all of them black— were arrested and charged with the brutal rape and murder. Yes, the man now suspected of the rape is also black. But he also lived just down the street from the victim. What is sad to me is that there are still those who believe these three men are still guilty! (One died in prison, one is suffering from brain and lung cancer and was released for treatment and one was just released from prison the other day after thirty years behind bars.)

The Innocence Project has freed hundreds of wrongly convicted men and among them, blacks are disproportionately represented. When are Americans going to realize that the criminal justice system is very broken and needs to be fixed? That the system is rife with racism and prejudice? That eyewitness testimony is notoriously unreliable? That people make false confessions after being questioned or threatened with even more charges or greater punishment? That police are allowed to lie to suspects and tell them they have evidence they do not have?

It’s a sad commentary on American society— the land of the free— that we have the highest rate of imprisonment at 756 inmates/100,000 population. And the vast majority of those are for drug convictions (but that’s another story altogether.) We outdo Russia (629/100,000)  for imprisoning our population by more than 20%.

Unfortunately, an overhaul of our judicial system is a daunting task and one that is very unpopular with the voting public. Which means that it won’t really ever be tackled….and more innocent people will wind up in jail where they’ll pay the price for something they didn’t do. But at least the masses will be happy and feel safe!

There’s a story in the news today about a father in Florida who was arrested after getting on his daughter’s school bus and threatening the bullies who were picking on her and the school bus driver who, apparently in the father’s eyes, wasn’t doing enough to protect his daughter. While I can certainly understand the father’s frustration and anger (my boys were constantly picked on because I’m gay), his actions only made the problem worse.

First, he has now reinforced in all those kids that the way to handle things when you’re a parent is to threaten violence against those you feel did you wrong. They don’t even have to do anything to you— you just need to feel that they did. Not all those kids tormented or bullied his daughter, but all of them were subjected to his threats. That’s a bad message to teach kids: retaliate with a higher level of violence than what was done to whomever was wronged. (An adult “f*cking” up a kid is a much higher level of violence than a child throwing condoms at or verbally teasing or even hitting another child.)

Second, he made his daughter feel even less powerless than she already feels. The goal in any situation where there is abuse occurring is to empower the victim of the abuse. And make no mistake, bullying is a form of abuse. You do that by allowing them to make decisions as to what will happen when they are abused again. You help them figure out all their options and then let them decide what they’re going to do.

In my older son’s case, he used humor to stop his tormentors. They kept taunting him that he was going to grow up to be just like his mom (ie, gay.) He turned that right around on them and said, “Yeah, I know! We both love women!” That did two things immediately. It diffused an escalating situation and it showed his tormentors that their taunting wasn’t really upsetting him. (Whether or not it was is another matter: sometimes bluffing through those things is your greatest asset.)

This father did nothing to help his daughter figure out how to solve the problem. And he simply can’t be there all the time for her. His best bet would have been to help her figure out how to handle it herself. And by herself, I don’t mean leaving her to fend for herself. How she handled it might have been to go to the principal or call the police from a cell phone or something. (Of course, there’s the social stigma of being a “snitch” that sends kids the message “Don’t get involved!” that adults drill into kids from the time they’re infants. And that is just as harmful. No wonder other kids stand by while bullying is taking place: they’ve been taught not to be a snitch!)

What is most disturbing about this story to me though is that the vast majority of people who posted comments to this story support what the father did! Despite all the evidence from mental health professionals and law enforcement that this sort of confrontation only makes things worse, most people think that what the father did was a wonderful thing.

They seem unable to see that what the father did only escalates the level of violence, takes what power his daughter may have felt she had away and reinforces the idea in the minds of all those kids that every situation should be solved by shouting and bullying and threatening and violence.

I’ve been rather busy lately since I’ve started taking paramedic classes and I’ve been working on revamping my website, adding new links on the front page to not only the books I’ve written but also to a new endeavor I’m trying: custom designed bookcases (or video game cases, DVD cases or even CD cases.) As a result, I haven’t posted here in quite a while. But I’m trying to get back into the routine of posting at least a couple times a week. So here’s some stories I’ve found that again highlight the need for equality for gays.

A man walked up to a closed Denny’s restaurant in Santa Maria, CA the other night asking to use the bathroom. He was allowed in and proceeded over to the table where some employees were sitting around talking. He asked one of the men if he was gay and when the man said yes, the invited-in intruder attacked him with a knife, slicing his throat and stabbing him in the neck and back. That is why hate crime laws are needed. When someone targets a victim based on something the victim cannot change or a civil right (like orientation, height, gender, skin color, faith,  age, etc.), then there should be mitigating circumstances for the punishment phase, just as there are harsher punishments if you use  a knife or a gun during a robbery.

This next one just had me flabbergasted and yet when I think about it, I’m kind of glad it came out because it shows just how unhinged these people are. Focus on the Family is now saying that anti-bullying campaigns are a product of the “gay agenda”. (I reveal the true “Gay Agenda” here.) And like the ACLJ (founded by Christian Coalition founder Pat Robertson (but you’ll find no mention of that on the ACLJ website, even in the “History of the ALCJ” section)) whose name is a direct rip-off of the ACLU, Focus on the Family has now created a new “wing” titled “TrueTolerance.org”, a direct rip-off of the Southern Poverty Law Center’s “Teaching Tolerance” program. While not stated in so many words, the hope is that you’ll get confused, and wind up on their website instead of the one that really protects your rights. (The “J” key is directly below the “U” key on your computer keyboard— one slip of the finger and you’re gonna end up at a sight that promotes the rights of Christians first and foremost instead of one that protects the rights of all citizens, even those who seek to take rights away from others.) It gives me some hope, though, because such a desperate act and such a ludicrous claim is a strong indication of their desperation as they see that the country is becoming more tolerant to those who are different.

Which leads nicely into the next story about a new study that shows that Americans are defining family in ways they haven’t been willing to do so before. Now, family includes gay couples with children in the minds of the majority. Ironically, it’s the unwed of any orientation who cohabitate that are not seen as “family”— unless they have children. The real irony is that, according to Brian Powell, the lead author of the book about the study, the anti-gay rhetoric is a large part of why gays are so much more accepted in society today than they were ten years ago.

A federal judge in California ruled in early September that the military’s policy of “Don’t Ask/Don’t Tell” was unconstitutional. Now, supporters of repealing the policy are trying to get the Senate to vote on the issue this week. The House voted to repeal the policy back in May, but without the Senate vote, the repeal won’t happen. The ruling has left the Obama administration in a rather sticky situation. The Justice Department is charged with defending all laws on the books…but the Obama administration wants the policy repealed. Of course, the US is way behind the rest of the world on this issue. Gays in Australia have been serving for the last 18 years and recently, the country decided to lift it’s ban on transgendered soldiers in the military.

In Minnesota, home of one of the most radical right wing conservative elected officials to Congress, Michele Bachmann, a rash of suicides by gay students in one school district who have been harassed in schools has led to the formation of an anti-gay group! Yes, a group of parents who are opposed to homosexuality has formed and is trying to get the board to “stand up” to “pressure” from the GLBT community. The school district already has a policy that issues about orientation are not even allowed to be mentioned by staff members, who must remain “neutral” on the topic. I wonder how that works with respect to gay teachers. Are they not allowed to say they’re gay? If so, why are heterosexual teachers allowed to “flaunt” their heterosexuality by using the terms “Mrs.” (for females”) or talking about their wives (for males)? Like the groups mentioned above, this anti-gay group hides a lot about who founded them and who funds them.

The Montana Tea Party president found himself in a boiling kettle recently when it came to light that he had posted jokes about the killing of Matthew Shepard on his Facebook page in late July. (The comments were screen captured and are viewable in the link above.)  While the president has since been removed from power, his comments only serve to cement the link between discrimination, bigotry, radical extremists and the Tea Party.

And finally, Glenn Beck has apparently decided to become a “spiritual leader” and is surrounding himself with all kinds of religious and spiritual folks. Unfortunately, most of them are virulently anti-gay. Of course, Beck is himself a radical extremist, so it doesn’t surprise me that he’s surrounding himself with more of the same. In fact, James Dobson, of Focus on the Family, is one of Beck’s right hand men. Dobson, who claims he has undergone the second act of grace which renders him incapable of sinning, even if it is his intent to sin. Now think this through with me. If he believes that he is incapable of sinning even if he intends to sin, then no matter what he does, it MUST be the “right” thing to do. No matter what he does, he believes he is doing the will of God. How is that for a scary thought?

This story sort of encapsulates so many things that are wrong with societal thinking nowadays.

• If you’re not with us, you’re against us. (Us v. Them)
• Black and white thinking
• Unwillingness to compromise
• Extremism
• Punishing children for the acts of adults
• Sexualizing women and young girls (very young girls in some cases!)
• Seeking your fifteen minutes of fame
• Silencing opposition
• Keeping females in a “supporting” role for the accomplishments of males
• Unwillingness to accept responsibility for one’s own actions
• Unwillingness to admit one may have been wrong

The mother of a six year old cheerleader complained about one of the cheers the squad was doing and so the other members of the cheerleading league voted to kick the six year old off the squad. And this is for a flag football league!

Apparently, what ticked off the members was that the mother went to the local media, apparently after not getting any sort of resolution from the league.

This whole issue has been so blown out of proportion and everyone involved, except the kids, should be ashamed of themselves.

Just wanted to give you something to think about….

If you oppose the building of the cultural center a couple blocks from the WTC, do you also oppose the building of a Christian church a couple blocks from the Federal Building in Oklahoma City where Timothy McVeigh, a Christian, used an act of terrorism to bring down the building and kill 168 innocent men, women and children?

If you oppose the cultural center but not the church, you’re a hypocrite and/or a bigot and/or a member of the sheep that are being manipulated by fear-monger radical Christian extremists who sugar coat their hatred under the guise of patriotism and God and apple pie.

THINK for yourselves before the start to police that as well.