In honor of the fortieth anniversary of Earth Day I thought I should point out that a second bipartisan inquiry into the so-called climate-gate non-scandal has been released with (as I’ve come to expect) virtually no media coverage – surprise, surprise, surprise…

This inquiry, similar to the first, noted that, “the focus on CRU and Professor Phil Jones, Director of CRU, in particular, has largely been misplaced,” and that Dr. Jones’s actions were “in line with common practice in the climate science community,” and the CRU’s “analyses have been repeated and the conclusions have been verified.”

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Can anyone tell me exactly what the fuck is wrong with the state of Arizona? There are at least twenty-two rational people there. But not enough to stop the Arizona state legislature from passing a law that, “Would require U.S. presidential candidates who want to appear on the ballot in Arizona to submit documents proving they meet the constitutional requirements to be president.”

In other words, Arizona is well on its way to becoming the first official birther state. Mesa Republican Representative Cecil Ash stated that, “He has no reason to doubt Obama’s citizenship but supports the measure because it could help end doubt.” Really? End the doubt, eh? He is apparently unaware that only the truly insane believe that shit in the first place. I know that there is some doubt lingering out there in Wingnuttia. I also know that this grim fairy tale is being deliberately propagated by people who know it to be untrue. But they have a political agenda and won’t let a little thing like the truth get in the way of delegitimizing the nation’s first black President.

Sadly this is the codification of the idiotic birther movement. Before the election the anti-Obama propaganda centered around his faith. He was either a secret Muslim, or he attended a anti-American/Black nationalist Christian church. They’re not sure which, but that didn’t matter. Being perceived as different is all that matters. Or it was his political leanings, he was either a fascist, or a committed communist. Maybe a Euro-style socialist, possibly an America destroying nihilist. But most likely he’s a monarchist who plans on declaring himself president-for-life African-style, sometime before the next election.

Coherence in your message doesn’t matter if your intended audience is incoherent. It doesn’t even matter if the political or religious views are diametrically opposed. Americans are equally ignorant about religion and political science. That allows the propagandists to choose any two (or more) views and cobble them together to better achieve that otherness effect. None of that other crap stuck, so they had to up the ante. What could do that most effectively? Make Obama the ultimate foreign usurping other, by calling his U.S. citizenship into question.

Is it too late to add Arizona to Glenn Beck’s plan for a Texas-sized Wingnut summer camp?

I’ll start by saying that Tina Fey is hilarious, but she is no where near as comical as her source material. For example I give you the latest inane diatribe from that nitwit of the north Caribou Barbie. Instead of her standard Facebook follies, this skit was performed at the Southern Republican Leadership Conference. Although I must say that it puzzles me why any conservative would pay good money to hear the equivalent of some nut-job ranting away while waving a sign that reads The end is nigh, when they could just go to any street corner in America (Thank Saint Ronnie for emptying the mental hospitals) and hear virtually the same thing for free. That just doesn’t seem fiscally responsible to me, but I digress…

Bible Spice continuously demonstrates her lack of even a ninth-graders understanding of basic history and science, she seems to think the Israeli-Palestinian conflict is driven by simple zoning disputes. This time however the half-term half-wit displayed her ignorance of science as well as her new found celebutard status by going on a bizarre tangent on the subject of energy. It started as more of the same thinly veiled sexual innuendo about getting drilled here and now, you betcha, also, too. But went far afield when she referred to the recently debunked climate-gate non-scandal as “Gore-gate”. Stating with a stunning amount of contrived authority that conservatives were justified being skeptical of the science, which she refers to yet again as, “snake-oil”.

I find the Snowbilly grifter’s interpretation of reality to be very strange indeed. So let’s set the record straight for all the reality challenged people out there. I’ll start with former Vice President Al Gore. Al didn’t have a single thing whatsoever to do with the so-called climate-gate non-scandal. For fuck’s sake it didn’t even happen in the States, it was a British University that was involved. It is just fucking idiotic to blame that on Al Gore. It was a deliberate and pathetically lame attempt by Mooseilini to inject every wingnut’s favorite whipping boy into the conversation. More of the same pathetic *attack the messenger* style of politics that we’ve come to expect from our conservative friends. When you don’t want to discuss an issue on its merits, quickly bring up Chappaquiddick or William Jefferson, or whatever the Democratic scandal du jour happens to be…

Next is the climate-gate story itself, I told you Faux news would neglect to report that story. For the poorly informed I have news, there was no scandal and the science is sound. But since Sarah clearly doesn’t read, and only watches Faux news shows in which she appears, she most likely missed that report. The only “snake-oil” here is what Sarah is trying to sell to the tragically gullible audiences of idiot America.

There has been no person in my memory who so personifies the current trend in celebrity, that being someone who is famous for no discernible reason. She has indeed become the perfect reality television star. I just wish she had took a shot at blowing Bret Michaels, or better yet joined The Bad Girls Club. Anything other than her vainglorious attempt at the Vice Presidency. America would be a better place if that nails on chalkboard voice of hers was only heard when some neck-tattooed Jersey girl dragged her around the pool by her bumpit…

I have written about the environmentally disastrous practice of mountaintop removal before, But I didn’t know that Massey Energy, a major player in that horrible practice, also ran traditional underground coal mines. It figures that a company that believes leveling Appalachia is a viable way of encouraging economic development would have the same callous disregard for its underground operations. The recent tragedy in West Virginia has now brought the scope of crimes (both human and environmental) committed by Massey CEO and all around douche-bag Don Blankenship into the national spotlight.

This man is a caricature, a veritable Snidely Whiplash of dirty energy and profit margins over people and our shared environment. He is also the High Lord of the Flat Earth society a.k.a. the Climate Change science denial crowd. He uses his position in the U.S. Chamber of Commerce to actively work against any changes necessary to mitigate carbon pollution and save humanity from the worst effects of anthropogenic climate change. After all what does he care, he’s very wealthy now, and he’ll be dead before the worst of the impending shit-storm occurs. As my older brother often opines, “Why should I care about what happens to my great-grandchildren? I won’t know them.”

As you may know there are distinct levels of Climate Change denial. The most prominent in the media are the people who acknowledge that it is occurring, but do so only because it’s totally irrational to completely dismiss the overwhelming amount of evidence that it is indeed occurring. They are the, ‘Yes it’s happening, but it is a natural phenomenon’ group. Then there are the people who say, ‘Yes humans are causing it, but there is nothing we can do about it lest we destroy the economy and lots of people will starve and die.’ As a corollary to that belief, there are the people who say, ‘Okay we can do something about it, but that will hurt the bottom line of important industries like coal and oil, and send us back to the stone age.’

Dirty Don doesn’t fit into any of these groups, he is firmly in the ‘Climate Change is a massive hoax and grand conspiracy‘ crowd. He believes the conspiracy is being perpetrated by a shadowy cabal of greedy scientists out to make a buck off the government, and those damn dirty librul elitist hippies who want to teach your kids to worship nature and to hate (not necessarily in this order) America, free-market capitalism, Mom, apple pie, the flag, the troops, and especially our Lord and savior Jesus Christ who taught us that coal will save your soul…